The Life & Times of a Hypothetical Dead Man
Somewhere in Cork, right now, there is a man with 2.6 gigabytes of Van Halen on his laptop. Did Van Halen even record 2.6 gigabytes of material? Who knows! This man has it anyway.
I am confused
Glad that you are back
Is it wrong that I fancy Dan?
About the van Halen thing, were you using a laptop that had all those tunes on it? Or do you just have the ability to detect the contents of any computer within a ten mile radius? You haven’t across any with, uh, 4.92 gb of Chris de Burgh, have you?
My methods are entirely prosaic. It was a simple matter of asking. Granted, I’m taking the figure on trust, because he didn’t show us folder properties or anything, but he did show us his iTunes library, and I can attest to a truly ludicrous amount of Van Halen.
It’s not wrong per se to fancy Dan, but our human mating rituals are rather alien to him, so he wouldn’t really understand what you were professing. Best of luck though.
L, I think it’s perfectly clear what’s going on. Perhaps your (hypothetical) poor dental hygiene is addling your pate.
Believe me, Van Halen may very possibly have more than 2.6Gb of music, even at a low bit rate.
Eddie Van Halen once auditioned to join KISS. True story.
Hmm. Very high quality files? Every live appearance ever? I can’t imagine anything other than option A or B, unless Eddie Van Halen has a lot of spoken word pieces in his back catalogue…
Eleven studio albums and a live album. Plus B-sides, potentially. They would want to be pretty high quality, wouldn’t they…
I must say, you would have stunned me simply by writing, “Somewhere in Cork, right now, there is a man with Van Halen on his laptop”. No need for gory details, like. Van Halen is disturbing enough.
Here now, everyone loves a bitta Van Halen. David Lee Roth era, obviously. Sammy Hagar can nonce off with himself.
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